For those of you who have ever been in a band, raise your hands. Tell me if you’ve experienced the personalities you work/play with as a sort of dysfunctional family. My musical groups are always nice when they start, then eventually everybody lets their guard down and the honeymoon’s over, guys (and girls).
For me, being in the Washington Squares -- Tom, Bruce, and I, sometimes adding a bongo player or drummer like Billy Ficca -- was just like having two hyper competitive siblings around who each wanted the most attention. Bruce was hyper, period, and Tom had his other moments. He made a lot of friends, along with a few enemies -- which I found out to my rue years later, once the band broke up and I tried to do a solo project.
Tom was managing us throughout the Squares because we couldn’t find a managerial candidate who wasn’t dreadful. I wondered if he just couldn’t relinquish control. . .
But, for whatever his other issues, at least Tom would talk to me. Bruce was a typical lead guitar player: brilliant musician, moody, quiet when you needed to talk about anything important, passive-aggressive, etc.
I don’t think he liked me, either, so I couldn’t get Bruce to talk with me about much of anything -- he’d vanish once we were done with a rehearsal or a show. At one point, Jill and Tom were trying to set up me and Bruce (as a couple) but our personalities didn’t mesh at all.
I didn’t really understand because I like to charm and take care of people (one reason I’ve had success with people, esp. the opposite sex). Bruce was having none of that! Besides, he wanted to be THE funny man, and didn’t laugh at other people’s jokes.
Best way to be my friend is to listen and laugh at my jokes (generally puns). Like I said, Bruce was having none of that. . . I do wish we could have been better friends.